los angeles ends

by simulcast

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    all orders come with a los angeles ends zine, written + designed by tristan rodman, along with sage handpicked and dried from the angeles mountains. all cassettes have been hand dubbed and painted with love.

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about

"i learned to drive to read los angeles in the original."
- reyner banham

'los angeles ends' is a record about my mom dying of cancer, big relationships falling apart, and the way that trauma makes the apocalypse feel like an appealing alternative to life. it's about channeling the kinetic energy of anxiety, finding small pockets of humor and community under crippling authoritarian rule, and deciding that – at a fundamental level – you no longer want life to end.

it's very easy to imagine the end of the world right now, it's much harder to imagine how best to live in it.

los angeles ends is filled with old synthesizers clocked by new software, rockstar drum performances by matt marsico, and production flourishes unimaginable without jay mamana. it's forever indebted to bowie, leonard, and prince. it's unimaginable without vin scully.

most of the songs are in a second person address that falls somewhere in between talking to a lost love and a lost parent. they also mostly take place in the car, on a freeway, around los angeles.

i hope you find the space to listen to it somewhere on the road, preferably at night, preferably with minimal traffic. turn it up loud and bring the windows down. when i was most frozen by grief, that was the only way i could thaw into tears. los angeles ends is a record for and from that impulse.

as i was finishing the record, sifting through the clutter at my parents house, i found a love note from a high school classmate. "somehow, being your passenger was the closest i'd gotten to achieving a deeper conversation with you," they wrote. driving with people is how i let them in.

may los angeles ends find you in your car, on a very pleasant good evening, where ever you may be.

- simulcast

this is volume two in a series. los angeles ends will return...

simulcast.bandcamp.com

credits

released October 8, 2018

:: all songs written, arranged, and produced by simulcast
:: engineered and mixed by seth manchester at machines with magnets in pawtucket, ri
:: mastered by heba kadry at timeless mastering in brooklyn, ny
:: dedicated to j. mamana and matt marsico, whose friendship and collaboration bring one of the deepest joys i've found in this life;
and to my mother, anne friedberg, who is listening, somewhere, on the other line

special thanks to alexis wood trujillo, chris lee, henry kwapis, isaac schneider, jack levinson, jim moses, new urban arts, and the rhode island state council on the arts

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about

:: never content :: Los Angeles, California

✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿ s u p p o r t ✿✿✿ ✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿ y o u r ✿✿✿✿ ✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿ l o c a l ✿✿✿ ✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿ l i f e r s ✿✿✿✿ ✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿

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Track Name: through the windshield
born to the freeway and radio masts
raised by my car and a black standard poodle
crashed turning left, sunset and western
i was trying to go home

looked through the windshield saw both of my parents
grabbed my keys, got back in the car
right hand scans the AM bands...

but this time i hit traffic
and the radio went static
car stalled, engine silent
Track Name: los angeles ends
a dream of falling daylight
underneath the orange glow so familiar in los angeles
as a cloud blooms on the horizon, i hear baseball on the radio

this is the light that will take us with it

a warm breeze in from the desert
with an exhale, i try to let go
listen to vin tell me what the sky looks like as the pitch comes in at 3-0

this is the light that will take us with it
Track Name: high occupancy vehicle
we were flying down the 105 when the traffic set in
the freeway, like a printed circuit, brought us to the end
through the windshield it was tail lights forever
i told you i didn't know if we'd make your flight
stuck in the diamond lane against the sunset we waited

if i didn't want you to leave why did i try so hard to make it seem that way
i didn't know how to ask you to stay

i'm driving east now
the sun has gone down, but the light's still hanging on
in every building tall enough to reflect it
i take my exit and wind up through the foothills
alone

if i didn't want you to leave why did i lie so often to say i'm okay
i didn't know how to ask you to stay
Track Name: horizon
got this feeling like i'm out of time
plucked up and replaced by someone else altogether
and they know me better

cast as my father in a mid-century home
from behind the glass i watch the city play itself
a screen and a window

i keep dreaming of the horizon
where the flatness ends
and i'm not quite there yet

bummer driving in the dead of night
when the light pollution blinds me from every star
and so i wonder...

if i take western as far south as it drives
and wind up in the redcar ruins of san pedro
do i pretend you're alive?
Track Name: almost right
you called from mulholland as i was getting into bed
already late i let the cell phone ring
i retreated, said i didn't need it
your love
took shape
in distance, affection, divided attention
uneven
i received it, said i didn't need it

almost right

i called from a carphone as i split the cahuenga pass
reception dropped before the phone could ring
i needed help, didn't ask
i'm sorry for that
for the imbalance of that
the distance between us, the static and signal
uneven
i retreated, said i didn't need it

almost right

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